Why Dominant Women Have A Hard Time Finding A Good slave

by Supreme Goddess Lorena
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A Goddess or Mistress can feel very disappointed, and even deeply depressed, when She cannot find a good slave. She will find that most slaves tend to be quite selfish, demanding, fake, may switch, will only role-play, and will have many other inappropriate behaviours that are unsuitable for so-called slaves. She will find it as hard to find a worthwhile slave as it is to find a good husband. It may help Her to understand somewhat by knowing that the following is the reason why Her search has been so difficult:

Vanilla men
-Are very literal about what they need in life and why they need it so when they seek a Woman is it usually only for the purpose of sex in order to reproduce himself (whether he realizes it at the time at not). When he is dating he will want Her to approve of his friends and to get along with them because he fears losing them once he commits to Her. he wants reassurance that he can still socialize with his friends once he is in a relationship with Her. This is not wrong but how many Women know that they can be dumped by their man and left alone all night when his buddies call and ask him to go out for a beer or to a game? But how many Women are known to dump their man when Her Girlfriends call Her? None. Most Women do the opposite. They dump plans with their Girlfriends the second a man calls. This is why many vanilla Women will wait by the phone hoping he will call and why most Wives complain to their husbands that he never takes Her out anymore. She wants to go out with a man but a man wants to go out with his buddies. How backwards that is!

Sex slave-Instead of only wanting to use Women for sex this man will only want to use Women for fetish sex. he will generally only be submissive in bed. he will only offer to serve Her in this way for one of two reasons. Either because he knows deep down it is the only thing he is good for and so he has nothing else worthwhile to offer Women. Or it is because he lives to serve his penis, not Women. (In other words, he is a penis with a man attached). So he will always offer (and sometimes too often) to be used sexually because in reality he only wants it for his own selfish reasons. he should try harder to understand that if Women want it then they will ask for it. Women are known for being expressive about what they want and do not want.

Session slave-Will only be submissive during what he terms as a "session" and he plays what he refers to as a "role". he can turn himself on and off like a light switch. he is a fake submissive.

Long Distance slave-Will not relocate in order to serve a Woman fulltime and instead prefers to be just a "fly by nighter" where he can choose when to come, get his fill, and then leave again. This leaves the Woman feeling used, he controls when the "session" will happen, and She soon feels like telling him to either start paying Her for using Her for "sessions" or to go see a Professional Dominatrix instead.

Friend server-Will only become your slave if he knows he can serve all Your girlfriends. he uses You for Your friends because he wants to serve many Women. he will not be devoted, dedicated, or loyal to You at all.

Slut slave-Will serve any and all Women instead of being devoted to just one. Women tend to look for security so when they look for a slave it is very similar to how they look for a husband. They look for a slave who will be devoted to serving Her at anytime She requires it. She will only be disappointed with a slut slave because he will be unfaithful, dishonest in how he feels about Her, and may even lie to all of the Women he serves in order to keep them each thinking that they are the only one he truly wants to serve. This proves that he does not really want Her at all but just wants "it" and to serve Women in general. he is only looking to get his fetish (of serving Women) filled. With this way of doing things, in the end he will never quite feel fulfilled and pretty well everyone in town will have done "it" with him. Every Woman will know of him and they will all feel as though they have a revolving door on their home. A slave hoping and asking to be able to serve his Owner's Girlfriends is wrong. A slave is only to serve other Women when and how his Owner wants him to. It should only be done to please his Owner and not to please other Women or himself.

A switch-Only wants to be submissive when he feels like being submissive. he may also try to "Top from the bottom" or manipulate for his fetish. This is a fake slave.

Fake subservient slave-Only wants to serve Women how and when he wants to.

Real slave-Will serve Women however and whenever She wants.

The real submissive man is the slave that all of Us Dominant Women are looking for and are hoping to find out there somewhere. Does he even exist? If he does but he is already owned, will his Owner consider sharing him with the rest of the Female population? If She will not share him, will the rest of Us be able to train the leftover slaves into being such a slave as he is? Perhaps the good olde days of non-consential slavery where a man was forced to be a Woman's slave was much better. Maybe those slaves tried harder at pleasing their Mistresses. Of course it was only to avoid a certain death but at least he put more of an effort into it. It that what is necessary or can men be trained in other ways to become the slave of Our dreams? I Myself am willing to keep trying in order to find out.

Copyright © 2000, 2003 Supreme Goddess Lorena of Goddessclub.com, All Rights Reserved.


Comments:

DEAREST SUPREME GODDESS LORENA;

The article about "why is it so difficult for a Goddess to find a good slave?" is valuable to both men and women seeking the D/s relationship lifestyle. SUPREME GODDESS LORENA describes nine different types of men, eight of which are the causal reasons for the frustrations a Dominant Woman might feel as She tries to find, obtain, and train a good slave. The main reason a good slave is so hard to find is that since slavery was outlawed it is strictly a voluntary activity for the man who is already by his very nature unreliable, irresponsible, lazy, disloyal, and shiftless. However their are a few truly submissive and servile men who are capable of at least filling the role as chattel. However, these true slaves are intermingled among so many other types of men, who even though they want to appear as being submissive are in actuality merely seeking to fulfill their own selfish desires at the Woman's expense! Consequently the Woman's search is complicated by these deceivers and She might begin to despair of ever finding that true slave and even begin to doubt his existence.

This was an especially good article for the men, as well. Often times men start out in a relationship with good motives and being inexperienced at the reality of the fantasy they fall prey to their weaker and latent characteristics. By realizing these tendencies are present the male has a greater chance of resisting them when they are manifested. Also, for the men who are only in the game for their own selfish fulfillment this article may give them pause to reflect upon the appereance of their actions and the pain that they inflict upon trusting and innocent people. Finally, the Woman, now being fully armed with knowledge is more powerful and better equipped to deal with these types of deceptive men.

Herein contains in brief the various types of slaves and also my personal reflections on ways that men with these tendencies could shift their attention away from themselves and upon their cherished Owners where it should be.

"Vanilla men," forget it. There is not much hope here other than to assert YOUR dominance any where that the opportunity presents itself and gradually increase the amounts of areas that You control in the relationship. However these types of men seek validation and companionship outside of their traditional marriage partner and so this is an uphill battle for the Woman.

"Sex Slaves," these types of men are not truly servile as they will only be submissive sexually and will be quite selfish in expecting the Woman to gratify and fullfill their needs. Also, he is concerned with his own pleasure rather than performing sexual service for the fulfilment of his Mistress. These types of men should should focus on other ways that they make their Owners happy. Do the dishes, clean, serve meals, etc. Once they see the joy they can create for a Woman it will make them feel better about themselves and they will feel better about themselves as they realize they do have more to offer than merely a presumed sexual service.

"Session slaves," are truly fake submissives and turn themselves on and off like a lgiht switch. Only a professional Dominatrix would derive any gratification from this type of slave. i would encourage these session players to find other ways to serve the Women in their lives and explore that submissive revenant within them that continually drives them into the session role play. If they allow their submissive side to manifest they might find themselves more content and feel the need less and less to, "play."

"Long distance slaves," want to be submissive but only when they want and at their convenience while maintaining their own separate autonomy. In fact this type of arrangement can actually be to their benefit at their Owner's expense! i would suggest that this type of person should sit down and reflect upon the emptiness he is inflicting upon the person he presumably loves and the hour glass of his own life's experience running swiftly through his fingers. he might realize the brevity of life and the importance of spending it with and in the service of the one he loves.

"Friend servers," will play at submission only to further their own selfish desires of pleasuring their Owner's friends. i would suggest that this type man grow up. Concentrate on pleasing your Owner! If she would ever decide that She would like you to serve Her friends that is fine but it is something you are doing because She commanded it and you are doing it to please your Owner first and most importantly. Don't ever even think about it on your own, your only priority in life is making your Owner happy.

"Slut slaves," want to have as much sex with as many women as they can under the pretense of honouring and serving Women. A man like this should realize that when he makes a committment to be enslaved that it is just like marriage. he must maintain his fidelity remembering that if he doesn't he will lose the trust of his Owner and the entire foundation of the relationship will crumble. Remember that your abstinence does you and your Owner honour. Finally if you still find it difficult, serve Women by showing them admiration and respect which is probably more meaningful to Them anyway.

"Switch slaves," are not truly submissive, they will often try to control the course of the relationship and the events that are allowed to transpire. i would suggest to this person that they should find someone submissive that they can actually dominate. If they are with a truly Dominant Woman then they might shift their focus onto controlling the situations by providing their Mistress with excellent service and concede all other matters to the Mistress. The level of service is the only thing a slave is really capable of controlling. his only desire should always be to increase his capabilities and to increase the pleasure of his Owner.

"Fake subservients," will only serve Women when and how they want to. Women should be leery of men like this. This type of man is only concerned with himself nd he might even enjoy the fact that he can cause the Woman pain, havoc, and inconvenience. i can only say to this kind of person to be careful because their actions will find them out sooner or later. they are destroying their own humanity and hurting themselves so much more than they are gaining in their illconceived and illgotten pleasure.

"Real slaves," will serve a Woman whenever and however She desires. i would say that these men will be happiest only when they are in fact able to serve a Woman. they need to be allowed to grow in their servitude even when they make mistakes. their abilities will improve with time and practice. If their hearts are in the trim all else will naturally follow in succession.

Thank YOU, SUPREME GODDESS LORENA, for taking time to read this i know YOU should be busy training YOUR good slaves rather than wasting YOUR valuable time on me! i wanted to ask permission to apologize one more time because when i think of how i treated YOU i shudder and want to vomit. my actions were disrespectful, rude, selfish, arrogant, hurtful, inconsiderate, and mean hearted to YOU. YOU are so special and unique and YOU deserve so much better treatment than that. YOU said in one of YOUR messages that YOU accepted my apology and forgave me, that is good because i will never forget nor forgive myself.

i never want to promise someone anything that i am unsure about keeping, but i want to promise YOU, SUPREME GODDESS LORENA, that i will never do that in that manner again. If circumstances necessitate changes i will find a more honourable, mature, and decent manner of approaching YOU. i will also include YOU in the decision making process. i do so badly wish to be YOURS.

Submissively YOURS, greg



This article explains from the inside out some of the real life challenges of being a Dominant Woman. Goddess Lorena speaks from Her heart and provides insight into the many ways submissive males disappoint our highly sought after counterparts. When confronted with all the manifestations of “submissive” male selfishness in one concise article it made uncomfortable. “Are we that bad?”

i began thinking about all those fantasies from a different perspective, Hers. What a pain the a$$ we are! i haven’t had all of the experiences listed there but, i have had more than my share. It became clear it is time to move away from all that “empty”
selfish thinking and head towards an honest submission that fights disappointment head on.

“Easier said than done.” you say? Agreed but, most worthwhile things are.

i am going to accept the gift from Goddess Lorena. A glimpse of what They face. i am going to apply this gift to better myself for Her.

Thank You Goddess Lorena,

trainee slave marcel k.


The reason for this problem is that most slaves are not real and are only out to satisfy their own fetishes. They may fantasize about being a slave but are not able to live up to it when the real thing happens. Many of them are only submissive during a session and switch when it is over. Some men are only slaves sexually and don’t live the lifestyle out of bed. A lot of men are only looking for an experience and are not willing to relocate for 24/7. Fake slaves only serve Women the way they want to. There are lots of men that will only serve a Woman if he can serve all of Her friends too. A true slave should be faithful to his Goddess and not just serve Woman in general. It can hurt a Woman’s feelings when a slave serves other Women.

A true slave knows that his place is to serve and he only wants what his Owner wants. his whole life and existence belongs to Her. he will obey her without question at all times. he will take pride and pleasure in serving her without expecting any reward. Any reward She gives Her slave is a privilege and he should worship her thankfully for it knowing that no reward is necessary for his unconditional servitude. The slave will gratefully cater to Her every whim, anticipate any needs She has, and serve her promptly and thoroughly. If all slaves were like that and not so selfish, the world would be a much better place for both Women and men.

trainee slave jason


The problem dominant Women have finding a good slave rests with how men are raised. men are not taught to honour Women properly and so we tend to develop inflated opinions about ourselves and desire independence. Essentially men are selfish. Even submissive men.

men tend to seek only one thing in life and that is sex. Vanilla men are very straightforward in their desires and when they can’t find what they are looking for, they prefer to move on. Submissive men seek a specific type of sex and hope only to find that specific type of sex. We are not as adventurous as Women. We are too goal oriented, “i want my orgasm!”

Sex-slaves seek their orgasm by finding a Woman who will gratify them on their terms. Men have to remember that Women are much more expressive than we are and if She wants something She is better able to discuss it than he is. Men also have to remember that they suffer from clouded reasoning, especially when they are in a state of arousal. Women become even more clear headed when aroused. For this reason, men have to try and remember to always listen to the Woman in his life because when he does, they both have a better time.

Session slaves turn on and off like a light switch which ends up disappointing to both.

Long distance slaves are not willing to relocate. Perhaps they (maybe me) hide behind the geography like it is a protective
blanket or shell and only has to serve his Owner when he has the time or inclination to. This slave should spend as lavishly as he can when in the presence of his Owner.

Friend servers hope to serve their Owners girlfriends and uses her as a means to that end.

Slut slaves can’t help themselves they want to serve ALL Women This is selfish! He is not serving any of them for their benefit he is merely gaining his fix like some kind of junkie. This type of slave really needs help. His behaviour only shames himself and hurts his Owner.

Switch slaves need to learn not to top from the bottom. Switches and fake subservients need to alter their fetishes from whatever they are to accepting that real gratification comes from granting the Woman all that She desires and on her terms.

Goddess Lorena remains willing to train slaves for the benefit of Women and men alike. We will all be happier and more content when ALL men learn to serve Women properly and without expectation of reward. The reward is Her happiness.

trainee slave brian w.


Why are Dominant Women unsuccessful in Their quest to find sincere slaves? The answer is obvious! This world is filled with pseudo slaves who are nothing but sluts, pretenders, selfish users, and vanilla pricks who will do anything to satisfy their sexual urges (excuse my language). In conventional relationships, vanilla men pretend to care for their Female partners until they know She is emotionally attached. Once this goal has been reached, they use their Female partners as sexual objects. In the process, they completely ignore their Owners' emotional needs. they use their female partners only when the need for sexual play arises. Other pseudo slaves will pretend to be subservient with the sole purpose of using their female partners to satisfy their fetish needs. Some slaves will even pretend to submit in the hope of getting in the pants of their female Owner's friends. All these pseudo slaves have one thing in common and that's selfishness. They are all pretenders who will never experience true happiness. In their quest to satisfy their sexual urges they loose the opportunity to experience what true pleasure is. True pleasure comes from the knowledge that a Goddess' needs have been met. Unfortunately, there are only a few true slaves who are willing to serve with their whole life. These sincere slaves will faithfully serve their Goddesses with their personal skills and abilities. Unfortunately, sincere Dominant Women have a hard time finding true slaves because of all these lowlife pretenders. However, there are some true slaves left who are willing to serve unconditionally and these slaves make the quest of Dominant women worthwhile even though they may have to search for a long-time.

i worship You with all my heart, Supreme Goddess Lorena

Your slave forever, trainee slave daniel t.


A Goddess or Mistress is unquestionably superior to a male, and it is natural for Her to be served by a slave. Owning a slave is right and proper for a Goddess or Mistress, and it must be very disheartening if She is unable to find one who is of the quality She deserves. There are many reasons for this problem, and although it is not practical, to go through them all, some of the main ones are as follows:

vanilla men are narrow-minded and suffer from acute tunnel vision. They lack the peripheral vision and understanding which is part of a Woman’s’ essential character. This tends to make men very selfish and inconsiderate, and causes them to emotionally hurt Women. Reproduction is what drives a vanilla man, and a Woman to him is only a means to an end. She will be expected to fit in with his plans and life, and if She doesn’t, he won't be interested in Her. So, not only do vanilla men not understand what is going on around them, then do not understand themselves.

‘Sex slaves’ are not much better than ‘vanilla men’, selfish and narrow minded with little or no knowledge of the needs of themselves or Women. They are only care about what they want, and everything else is a means to an end.

‘Session slaves’. Deep down, every Woman and every man knows that Women are superior to men and should be worshipped as such. During a session, a man feels good because his deeper self is telling him that he should be worshipping Women all the time. It is just a matter of accepting the truth of Female superiority.

‘Long distance slaves’ accept Female superiority, but are not truly submitting to their Goddess or Mistress. If She tells Her slave to relocate, then he should obey. If he has a problem with that, then he should inform his Goddess or Mistress, listen to what She has to say and then follow Her advice. A Goddess or Mistress is always right, and certainly has a better understanding of what is best for Her slave.

‘Friend servers’ are just topping from the bottom. This is simply a case of the Goddess or Mistress being used by the slave to access other Women. A slave can only have one Goddess or Mistress. In serving Her, he may be instructed to help other Women, but the bottom line is that he can only be devoted to one Goddess or Mistress.

‘slut slaves’ try to serve many Women. Because of a slave lack of vision and understanding, he will make assumptions, fail to appreciate the depth of every Woman’s’ individuality and fail miserably. A Goddess or Mistress can take a slave and train him to Her exacting standards, and if he devotes himself totally, he may please Her. But when a slave tries to serve another Goddess or Mistress, the second one will have different standards and will require a different set of exacting standards. The only way a slave can do this is by only being superficial and not being devoted. This usually indicates that the slave is only really seeking pleasure for himself. This is wrong. A slave should devote himself to one Goddess or Mistress only, and should only serve other Women when so instructed by his Goddess or Mistress. This, as in all things, should be solely for the pleasure of his Goddess or Mistress.

A ‘switch’ is some one who does not accept Female superiority. They only play at being a being a slave, and do not truly submit to the superior Female gender, or accept their authority and guidance. He will almost certainly try to top from the bottom.

A ‘real slave’ is what every Goddess or Mistress deserves. Because of social conditioning, they are very hard to find. Probably the best that a Goddess or Mistress will get, is a male with an open mind, who is happy to learn. More men are becoming open about themselves and their true nature. Once a man accepts the superiority of Women, and is prepared to submit, commit, and obey in an honest and devoted way then it becomes easy for the Goddess or Mistress to train them. Of course, it would be much simpler if there was compulsory and unconditional slavery. Every one would be much happier.

Your obedient trainee slave philip j.


What i learned from reading this article:

A real slave is very rare. What is a real slave? That is stated in Your other article: "What makes a good slave?" There are so many commandments, do’s and don’ts, and the possibility that every thing is okay, is very rare. Looking at myself i must admit that i am rather selfish, stubborn, obstinate and even worse, not a slave to be excited over. At certain moments it’s very difficult for me to accept that You, my beloved Goddess, have always the last word. my tendency to argue, to reason and to discuss matters is so constantly present, and many times i forget that You are the ultimate source of truth for me. In various kinds of reasons that are stated in the article i recognize certain elements of myself. Poor Goddess Lorena, what an awful job You have in training imperfect slaves. i am realizing how often i am ungrateful to You and Your high ideals. So i want to acknowledge You and will give You all the honour You deserve so richly for Your beneficial work. You are doing, without hesitation a great job.

Why is the search for a good and real slave so difficult? There are a lot of reasons. i will follow Your categories and give some personal commends:

*Vanilla men: for these men it is near an impossible exercise to become a good slave. men in a vanilla relation are not accustomed to a demanding Lady. These men will be spoiled, that means, they will be accustomed to a wrong reality. In this reality, the Women are complaining a lot, but the responsibility to change is not token. That means a lot of missed chances for both parts of the partnership.

*Sex slave: men who are only in bed submissive and after his sexual need is fulfilled his submissiveness is disappeared. That’s a good reason for a Mistress to control the releases of a slave. To much sex makes a lazy slave.

*Session slave: a variant of the sex slave. Also this men are only submissive during a so called session.

*Long Distance slave: this kind of slave is not willing to relocate in order to serve the Woman of his choice. i feel very guilty when i am writing this.

*Friend server or slut slave: this is the type of all Women friend. A charming type who needs the attention of a Woman in any way. This is not the type of man who is specific dedicated to his own Mistress, he is always looking for other adventures.

*A switch or a fake subservient slave: these are men who use so called submissiveness as a mean to reach own selfish goals.

After this sad survey it is time to talk about the real slave. This is the slave who wants to serve his Mistress however and whenever She wants! But they are very rare, as called earlier. The first question is: does he even exist? And so yes, then be sure that he will be owned by a proud Mistress and that She is probably not willing to share Her property with others. In the ancient times slaves feared their life and had to live in a situation that they were forced into slavery. In O/our days this is totally different and training must make the difference.

my beloved and adored Trainer and Goddess, i admire You perseverance! And will You please never stop to train me, Your humble and unworthy slave. i will try to do my very best and hope not to disappoint You. And i hope that You are motivated to continue Your training activities for Your trainee slave! i am very happy that i may know You, a very demanding Lady. By Your influence on me there may be the hope that there will some day become something serviceables of me. i trust on You. i bow before You and give You all the honour You deserve so richly!!!

Your trainee slave leo


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